Tag Archives: hurt

One Works Better.

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My Favorite Television Show. . .

Is by far ABC’s Nashville, which is on every Wednesday at 10pm, (just in case you want to watch).

Anyway, in the past month or so, along with my present situation, one of the songs off the soundtrack has most definitely been my theme song. Have you ever had one of those songs that just pumps you up and puts you in a better mood right quick? This is one of those songs for me.

The song is called One Works Better sung by Clare Bowen and Sam Palladio (Scarlett and Gunnar in the show).

If you haven’t heard it, go listen, but I’m going to paste some of the lyrics here:

Oh, this plane can fly on just one engine; This heart can beat without affection.

I’m not a choice, I’m a natural selection.

Well, this house can stand just fine on it’s own; This hand’s gonna rule without a throne.

I’m not a mother, I’m a queen of invention.

I’m gonna make you see the difference between just quitting and survival.

I’ve got a voice and I’ve made my choice between heartbreak and revival

Oh I know you’ll hate how I make everything look easy to do;

Oh, but it’s my pleasure doing everything better without you,

‘Cause this one works better than two.

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Have you figured out where I’m going? There’s so much I could say, but I’m trying to keep myself on track.

The point is this: we are all valuable, no matter what you believe, and we deserve to be treated well. We have strength, even if it is merely minute and hidden somewhere deep inside us. We all have the power to tell ourselves that “it will be okay.” And above all, we all have the ability to put our pasts behind us, even if it isn’t the easiest thing to do.

The thing is, it’s okay to struggle. It’s okay to suffer. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to be mad.

But then comes the moment that is, in all honesty, up to you in the long run – that moment when you pack up your past in a box and throw it up in the attic, only to be opened up for memories later down the road of life. Some people never make it to this point; like I said, it’s a choice. I decided, though, that it was inevitable – I had to make this choice for my own sanity. It’s not really a one-day thing like spring cleaning; it is a slow process of placing more and more in the box each day. Some days, nothing goes in; some days, some comes back out.

As I’ve heard before, “You take one step forward and two steps back,” and that’s normal.

So. Today will you open up your box? Look inside? Think of what you can toss? Go for it.

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“Two wrongs don’t make a right; one leaves the other behind. And I’ve found you only regret when you stay too long with the one that you’ll forget.”

-Nashville ♥

You Deserve Better

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Shout Out to Anyone Hurting Today

What does it feel like to be hurt by the person you love? Can you describe in words exactly what that feels like?

I’ve tried. I still don’t have a description.

But whatever it is, it isn’t pleasant; in fact, I’m absolutely sure that there’s nothing like it.

However, we were made to be strong people. We are people that strive to be positive and to be happy. So, how can you do that when you’re hurting? Trust me, I know it seems impossible. But here is what I’ve learned:

Think About Who Hurt You.

Did you deserve it? Probably not. Nobody deserves to be hurt. Does this happen often? Do you consistently feel this way? Please listen to me and understand that it won’t get better.

I’ve learned that sometimes all you can do is try; you can give every single piece of yourself and find that it still isn’t good enough, that they want more. Sometimes you keep trying to give and to give and to find more within yourself that might satisfy them, pacify them. But it won’t. It never will. All that happens is you find yourself near complete destruction.

This sounds extreme, and it is if you think about it, but these things just happen over time and sometimes you don’t even see it. Open your eyes, okay?

This is my piece of sunshine for you: You are worth it and you don’t deserve anything less than the best, no matter who you are. You deserve to be treated with respect. You deserve to be free to accomplish your goals and dreams. You deserve to feel loved.

It’s hard, but let the bad out of your life.

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Thankfulness

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Sleeping Doesn’t Come Easy…

“How fickle my heart and how woozy my eyes,

I struggle to find any truth in your lies.

And now my heart stumbles on things I don’t know;

My weakness I feel I must finally show.

Lend me your hand and we’ll conquer them all,

But lend me your heart and I’ll just let you fall.

Lend me your eyes; I can change what you see,

But your soul you must keep totally free.

Har har, har har. Har har, har har.”

The lyrics of Awake My Soul by Mumford & Sons haunt me this morning as I cannot sleep. I think the mixture of medicines I’ve been given for my back either make me extremely drowsy or keep me from getting a wink of sleep. It seems as though I am tired during the day and then awake at night – nocturnal much?  My mom came into my room this morning and laid with me for a while after she put ice on my back (say 2:30 a.m.) and at around 4:00 we got up and ate. So here I am blogging at 4:49 a.m. pretty drowsy, I must say.

Justin talked to me for a bit before bed which was nice; he’s been busy lately and we haven’t had much time to talk. I felt better after hearing his voice, even if it was only for a little while. Mom talked to me the whole time she was laying with me; neither of us could sleep. Now Jersey is beside me on the couch, completely knocked out – I’m so jealous!

Luckily, in these past few days I’ve been thinking about how lucky I am to have such amazing people in my life to take care of me and my back. My mom, first of all, has been so wonderful – taking me to the ER, getting my pills, rotating between ice and heat, talking to me and keeping my company, getting my food, etc. I’m so glad I don’t have to do it all by myself – I would probably just cry.

Hopefully I will get to feeling better soon; I hate missing work and school! On a more positive note, though, I ordered my prom dress this weekend, though, and I can’t wait for it to arrive so I can bedazzle it for May 5th (:

Here are some pictures that have made me smile lately:

 

Blog, Blog, Blog

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Sing, Sing, Sing…

“We were barely eighteen when we crossed collective hearts,

It was cold, but it got warm when you barely crossed my eye.

And you turned, put out your hand, and you asked me to dance;

I knew nothing of romance  but it was love at second sight.

I swear when I grow up, I won’t just buy you a rose,

I will buy the flower shop and you will never be lonely.

For even if the sun stops waking up over the fields,

I will not leave, I will not leave ’til it’s on time.

So just take my hand; You know that I will never leave your side.”  ♥

This song is called The Gambler by FUN; it was introduced to me by Justin as another favorite of ours. I’m sorry for my absence recently – I have been struggling with some terrible back pain and mostly laying down and/or sleeping. Luckily, I’ve made up all my missed schoolwork for this week – whew! My mom has been a godsend during all of this, too; she got my medicine for me, took me to the doctor’s, retrieved ice/heat for me, etc. etc. etc. I’ve been lucky this week.

Last time I posted, it was Justin’s and my anniversary and I was going to spend the weekend at his house. It was a great weekend and he had started to feel better by then, luckily. We had a blast just laying around watching movies, talking, and reading some magazines. I also met his friends, Jeremy and Chris, and Shayla visited for an hour or so, too. I’ll be seeing him again on March 30 for our Cardinal Chorale concert on the 31st at Muskingum University. Can’t wait (:

Otherwise, I’m attempting to work this weekend but I called off for today – my back pain is still killing me despite the muscle relaxer and steroid ): Not sure what will happen next; I hope it goes away. It looks like spring has sprung! The weather is great, even with the spring thunderstorms, and the flowers are beginning to bloom. Before my back got really bad (last weekend), I was able to capture a few pictures of my friend spring. (:

 

Sunshine?

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Quote-Reading This Morning….

“I’ve learned that no matter how good a friend someone is,

they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.”

I guess that reading this quote made me realize that no matter what, you are going to get hurt. Maybe hurting is a part of life – like we have to hurt to remember what being happy feels like? Going to Justin’s this weekend definitely reminded me of what happiness feels like – to get to do absolutely NOTHING at all but relax, attack pomegranates, and play Jenga. I feel like I’m always going and doing…. it makes it so difficult to just sit and do nothing when I know that there is something I could be doing.

But about being hurt. Yeah, it’s a given – you will get hurt. To be honest, though, there are people who take advantage of that and hurt you often. That is different than someone hurting you once or twice. I feel like there are sometimes you just HAVE to GET MAD!  I have this tendency to let things go but then stew over them by myself until I get so overwhelmed with feelings and then …

E X P L O D E!

I realized, though, that it is much easier to always remember that people are going to make mistakes and sometimes those mistakes may hurt you. While you don’t always have to get mad or upset, you certainly don’t have to be walked on either. Sometimes standing up for yourself is the hardest yet most rewarding thing you can do. It isn’t always easy and it doesn’t always fix the problem at hand, but when people think that you are weak, they can so simply make you feel that way!

Don’t let them. You are worth it.

Words Hurt

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I found a quote this morning….

“Bruises mark the surface; words sink in deep.”

I pondered this quote after reading it once or twice and realizing its relevance. I’ve been wondering lately about how people can possibly be so hurtful without a care in the world and this quote made me see what an impact words have on others. While some words are often misunderstood and taken in a different context, some are said with intention to sting deep within another person. Of course, everyone is guilty of saying something hurtful at least once in his or her life, if just once is even possible. But what about those people that consistently hurt our feelings? What do we do about them?

To be quite honest with you, I didn’t approach this blog post with any advice because I really have no idea myself; this is just a wandering thought. It just amazes me how some people have the inability to be kind and caring, how some can just speak hate without thinking and without regretting. It’s truly sad, I have to say; I wish the world could be filled with peaceful and happy people!

Question to Ponder: How can you profess to know someone so well but say the things you know will hurt his or her feelings?

I know my blog is usually full of sunshine and inspiration, but I guess the sky is a bit overcast today. :/

When you say things, think about the effect they may have on the person with whom you are talking. Please.